In the pages of a kindergarten journal, an adult man recently discovered a reminder from a time he knew little about. This discovery has reignited interest in the phenomenon known as vanishing-twin syndrome, and its possible impact on the twin who survives.
Drawings by children are treasured keepsakes. They’re not only cute, they also offer a window into the inner life of a child. According to a study conducted by Masoumeh Farokhi, Masoud Hahemi, from Iran’s Islamic Azad University in 2011, a child’s art can provide insight into his or her social, emotional and physical development. Children use simple materials like paper, a pen, and a brush to convey their emotions and express themselves.
AJ (a 32-year old artist from Virginia) experienced it first hand during a recent trip to California with his mother. He detailed this experience in a Reddit thread. When they were sifting though old boxes, his kindergarten book was found.
AJ explained that the notebook was at the bottom of a box. We decided to look it over since we were visiting. “I was looking through the notebook with her and laughing at silly spellings and drawings. When I flipped over a page, that’s when we saw it.” “It really made us stop in our tracks.”
On the page was a drawing and the phrase: “Today, I sat next to my brother.” It was a seemingly innocent comment that had an underlying, deep meaning.
AJ said, “I’m an only-child.” When I was a child, I would tell my parents that I had a twin brother.
In his words, “I felt like someone was missing in my life ever since I was young.” His parents dismissed the idea at first, saying that it was an imaginary friend. This is common in children and especially those who are creative. “They assumed I had imaginary friend because I’m an artistic person, but I explained that it was my brother Samuel.
AJ identifies with Phil and Lil from shows like Rugrats. His belief in his own identical twin is further strengthened by his memories of watching these programs. But his parents had a strange reaction to this. His father would be bothered by his mother’s behavior. They never encouraged me to speak about it, like they would with the other stupid things I said. It was an unusual reaction that hinted at a family mystery.
AJ did not learn about Samuel’s true identity until he reached the age of 15.
“She miscarried the baby at around 30 week but managed to keep me.” He said that we were fraternal, or brother twins. AJ was the only child that survived after his mother suffered multiple miscarriages. He said, “She had suffered four miscarriages prior to this. I am the only child of hers who survived.” It makes sense that his parents would be uncomfortable about him having a brother or sister, given the family’s history of miscarriages.
They explained that this miscarriage is likely caused by vanishing twins syndrome. In this condition, one twin goes missing during pregnancy. The tissue of the twin who disappeared will be absorbed into the body of the other twin, or even the mother. “Since she never actually dispelled his body, doctors said that I likely ‘ate’ him, or absorbed him, which is apparently not uncommon in losses of one twin. “I’ve heard that the body provides nutrients for the twin to grow.”
AJ’s response to the news was surprising. I didn’t even feel sad or surprised. This was a sort of fact of my life. Like, I’m sure that you have a twin. “I knew it already,” said he.
In retrospect, he recalls feeling an eerie presence and the sense of “not being alone” in certain rooms. At other times, he recalled even talking to his “twin”. I’d feel like he was talking to me, but without using words. He felt a presence in the room that he never fully understood, and was aware of but not able to explain.
AJ claims that the feeling of another’s presence, while it faded with age, is “normal”.
This discovery was an important reminder. The discovery of the kindergarten drawing was a poignant reminder for AJ. It gave him a chance acknowledge and reconnect with a piece of himself that he had lost. A chance to “hello” his vanished brother, Samuel. It is important to remember that in the case of the disappearing twin syndrome, there may still be a presence present in AJ’s life that he should explore and be aware of.